Welcome to Prim Tales!

Gnomish trickery invades the internet….

Wyland, here. After many attempts and false starts, it appears I have finally managed to get Prim Tales more or less operational. Perhaps that is not as dramatic as “fully armed and operational”, but it gets the job done.

Anyway, welcome to Prim’s site! (Don’t look at me, I just record it all.) Here I intend to place, for your enjoyment, the various misadventures, mishaps, and some other word starting with “mis” that our red-headed gnome bard gets into / creates.

More detailed explanations as I feel like updating. Personally, I kind of feel it pretty clear what this is about.

I will get various old Tales up on the site soon. Meanwhile, enjoy the fact it exists. Is that not enough???


Art by my friend CMP, patreon.com/CallMePlissken

Prim and Tia Adventures 7

Well, things look downright depressing at the end of 6. So, let us see where 7 takes us.

As ever, commentary (aka, “blather”) below the link.

We hope you enjoy!

A while back, I realized the two needed to split up. For storytelling reasons, and also to add a bit of spice to their relationship. And it obviously needed to happen when Tia found out Prim’s secret.

Now, I had intended for them to have several misadventures before finding one another again. Then that changed to one following the other. Which followed which? I never really decided. I was pretty sure Prim would do the following.

And then I made the mental shift from “writing epic novel” to “just pop out a little bit every now and then, keep the story going.” This is key, because … well, when I was writing 7, suddenly the dragon spoke in Prim’s mind.

Let me tell you, I was nearly as surprised as Prim.

I promptly thought — nah, this is too much — and tried to pass it off as Prim’s imagination. I wrote quite a bit. And then … nope. The pull was too strong. That had to be the dragon, for real.

This changed a lot. I could no longer justify keeping the pair split for multiple adventures. With Prim in a right state and the dragon so near to Tia and now the dragon COMMUNICATING with Prim … Well …

Also … Tia the hothead would still have immediately turned around once she cooled off. We all know that.

And, thus, the reunion occurs in this chapter. Well, so be it.

What is ahead? Essentially the same plan I had in mind.

I also hope one can start to see the danger for Prim of using the power she snagged from the dragon. Giving Prim this hidden power is dangerous, from a storytelling perspective, because the reader can always go back and ask “why did she not just use her powers to get them out of such-and-such situation”?

I hope the answer is becoming clear. At least, in-world. For us, her not using them makes it all the more fun!

Oh, and one other matter: Boy, you should have seen Tia’s apology … At first, it was nothing more than “I’m sorry”, which would have been utterly inadequate. So, on second go-around, I added to it. And then added. And added. And added some more.

Pretty soon, Tia was giving a most un-Tia lengthy, blathery speech of an apology!

(Prim must have told me that part of the story, giving it her usual brand of embellishment.)

I had to spend quite the effort trimming it down. I still think it a little long, but she needed to convey quite a bit. I think it works.

Enough of me blathering. We hope you enjoyed Adventure 7. Cheerio! o/

Prim in “Scaly Tale”

NOTICE: Adventures 6 is finished and due to be posted 06 Sep 20. Date and chapter number purely coincidental. Adventures 7 is also written, to be posted 13 Sep 20. Also coincidental you can add chapter and date to get two 20s. Or did you even see that? Is it just me? Am I that much fo a geek?

Ahem, anyway … Carry on to the actual post. END NOTICE

Yes, this is a Prim Tale, not a Prim and Tia Tale. It is set about a dozen years before the pair met. Let’s get right to it, shall we? Commentary below, as usual.

We hope you enjoy Prim in “Scaly Tale”.

As mentioned in the Adventures 5 post — wait, you read that already, right? No? Well, then, what are you doing here? Go read Adventures 5! We’ll wait.

Ahem. Caught up? Good.

As mentioned in the Adventures 5 post, this Tale had a lot to do with Prim’s … situation? Whatever word you wanna use there, go for it. This is the Tale that started Prim down that path.

I realized I had not provided it on the site, so … now I have. Important context actualized!


This Tale is one of those rare moments that things just … work. I mean, just, BEWM, idea that is super fun and sooooo fitting. Yes, the penultimate moment of the Tale … Prim’s response to the dragon. It just came to me.

And I wrote around it.

And I thoroughly enjoy this slapped-together, one-evening little Tale. No stressing over it, no getting everything “just so”. In fact, I never bothered to go in and check if certain words or phrases were repeated and in need of ye olde thesaurus.

I have, however, made a few adjustments and fixes. There is a hilarious “feow” which is clearly supposed to be “fellow”, but I most definitely hit the l and then the backspace on the phone, the two “keys” being next to each other. Also, I removed a moment of Prim cursing. It really did not fit.

Well, it could be argued it showed Prim was still less proper (haha) than we know her today …. Nah.

And why do I feel a need to put a comma after every “now”? Derp.

… annnnd …. I have made a few actual tweaks to the story. Haha. What can I say? It seemed like it needed to be done.

As for Prim’s armor, that is a reference to the fact our D&D group constantly turns any dragon kill into armor. I always thought it a bit … eww.

And, yes, Prim had red dragonscale armor in D&D, haha.

Anyway, that is probably enough blather for one post. Cheerio!

Prim and Tia Adventures 5

Okay, here we go …. Commentary (WITH SPOILERS) afterwards.

We hope you enjoy the latest chapter in Prim and Tia’s Adventures.

You really, really should read it before continuing to commentary, ya cheater. 😛 …

Right, then.


This chapter has long been in the works. I have gone through dozens of iterations for Prim’s reveal. I even had a few based on silliness back at the DD, just to link up to the gang there, but for reasons, they fell through.

In fact, delaying Prim’s reveal has hindered my ability to scribe Tales. There are such important details that have to be shown before I can really advance Tales much further. Well, now you have a fairly big one!

It has also hindered my ability to stream. I know most readers would prefer a lack of spoilers … well, how does one stream stuff like this without giving it away? Yes, most viewers do not actually read the material as I stream, rather just there for fun and goofing … but still, how’d you like to read Prim with wings out of the Blue? Heh heh.

Now, to be clear: Prim has always had her secret. Though, initially, she was actually an angel on a mission to go around and help people / spread beauty and cheer. Whether she knew she was an angel or not was still in the air. Either way, I decided, after some time, that did not make really work in the end. You may have noticed she hardly ever mentions beauty anymore? This is a big reason. Another is to avoid turning her into a one-trick pony haha.

With the dragon power, it was nice to have her be distinct from any of Tia’s latent-but-growing Gift of the Rage and its fiery aura, but I found a way (I think) to work with that. Adventure 6 should point to that a little.

So, here I was with angelic Prim, realizing it was not going to work, and then Scaley Tale popped out one day, and boom, I had the seed of an idea. Rather than Prim be anything other than a full gnome, she had taken (read: “stolen”) the power in question. And rather than divine, it is dragonkind.

This would mean her zaniness is entirely her own, as the Tales with Lilly happened BEFORE the events of Scaley Tale. In other words, Prim has always been a bit wild and impossible to keep tied up for long.

Yes, this goes back to Scaley Tale. It has been years since I wrote it, heh. I do not know if I even have posted it on this site. I probably should check, add it for any new readers.

I wrote that in a few hours. On my phone. I just had a germ of an idea, the punchline of the entire Tale. Scribed it out. Shared it. I think it was the day after I shared Scaley Tale where I came up with the “stolen power” concept. Goodness, it took fire and ran wild in my mind….

That is how things can switch in a heartbeat. Life is weird that way.

But, well, it has not been easy for the reveal. Because giving Prim this power is very, very dangerous from a storytelling perspective. I hope the reader can be patient with it. I hope I can manage to tell the story in a manner that is convincing.

More than anything, I hope everyone enjoys the Adventures!

And I hope folks can forgive me if things are imperfect … I finally decided the perfect is the enemy of the good enough, shoved my concerns aside, and just started writing it out.

I hope to have 6 scribed soon. It already has half a page written. In fact, 5 was going to continue, but then I realized it was already long enough and needed to be broken up.

Thus, cliffhanger. You’re welcome.

Thank you for reading this far! Cheerio! o/

Adventures 4

Okay. I … do not quite know what happened with this one, haha. It was not particularly planned. I had an idea to go one way … and then Prim took it another.

Let us just get to it first. Without further ado, chapter 4 of Prim and Tia Adventures.

Finished? Good! Because SPOILERS!

We hope you found that entertaining. It was definitely unexpected on our end.

No, really, I had not planned on them going to the bath. I had intended for the pair to go to the pub. They still will, mind, but this little side-quest thing happened first, haha.

And then Tia is off having another spirit dream, and I am left here scribing it, trying not to think too hard, because my brain was hurting. Though I did laugh at how the wolf was like “oh, you’re here? Yippee.”

You think that hummingbird is constantly annoying it while Tia is away?

Meanwhile, should I have done more with them in the bathing hall? Perhaps. In fact … <goes back to scribing>

There. Now Prim did not merely accept Tia saying she could scrub her own back. Kind of a boring way to go about it, in retrospect. And, yes, that little bit of scrubbing backs was added just now because … well, it just seemed necessary, really.

The entire thing feels much more like a Tale, less like an Adventure. But, it does advance things … a little … and get me scribing again. Now to scribe the planned scene into 5 rather than 4, I guess, lol.

And gnomes in bathing halls has to be win, right?

Aly’s Bet

Okay, the story behind this one: Way back in the day, a couple of dear friends pestered me to write an accompaning story to the pic one of them was drawing on stream. You see, the main character was on stage, and various characters were in the audience as silhouettes. Since Prim and Tia were among the characters, the cry went out: Scribe a Tale! Scribe a Tale!

They were being playful, but I was tired and grumpy and annoyed at ’em. Because grumpy me being annoyed is not atypical in the least.

It seems, when I get tired and annoyed, I scribe a Tale. That’ll show ’em!

Ahem. Right.

I do not like writing other folks’ characters. It is something that is … uncomfortable for me. I put my heart and soul into my own characters, so the connection is what lets me scribe. That’s what I keep telling myself, at least.

Anyway, perhaps we should just present Prim and Tia in “Aly’s Bet Tale”.

Contribution Tale

Here is a little Tale just for fun. Small amount of rambling below the file, of course.

We hope you enjoy Prim and Tia in “Contribution Tale”!

Usually, I like setups and payoffs, so this Tale is a bit different. That said, it just seemed a fun moment. I do believe we can imagine what Prim did to cause the damages, and we can imagine Prim spending the next few nights paying for it. Tia, meanwhile, takes the opportunity to actually stay in one place for a while and relax.

Also, it shows the two are truly well-meaning, even if things can get out of hand every now and then.

So, yes, I am a bit lazy. But, I think readers enjoy a bit of freedom every now and then to decide exactly how these things came to be.

Or, maybe, I am just rationalizing.

Either way, we hope you enjoyed it!

More Tea, More Mayhem

Okay, this one has a bit of a weird history to it. I have felt a have been wandering about in the Twilight Zone regarding it.

First, perhaps you should read the Tale? Yes, that might be best. Without further ado, we hope you enjoy Prim and Friends in “More Tea, More Mayhem Tale”, with special guests! It is a sequel of sorts to “Teaparty Mayhem”.

Okay, so, let me give a bit of background explainer for this one.

It began simple enough — I asked KatieD and We Are All Mad Here if they had ideas for a friend. They came up with a scene with their characters along with Prim, Tia, and Millie. Something like six characters?

They then decided on the scene being … a tea party! With Prim teaching Evie and Elspeth … Well … You read the Tale.

Now, I felt in a bit of a bind. You see, I had written “Tea Party Mayhem” back in the day as a gift, and I did not consider it my property per se. Yes, I owned the characters and story, but I felt, as it was a gift, the decision of whether to ever share it belonged to the friend to whom I had gifted it.

But, dang, if Katie and Mad were not essentially (unknowingly) working our way into me scribing a sequel!

I spilled the beans a little about having scribed a tea party Tale already. Then I asked my friend if I could post the original Tea Party Mayhem, and he agreed, saying it was mine to do with as I pleased. That cleared that up! Whew!

Good to know I made things more complicated than they had to be.

Or, another day ending in -y.

So, I shared the first tea party Tale. With that out in the open, the three of us were able to better tailor the sequel. At first, I left Lilly out of it, because I wanted more focus on their characters, Evie and Espeth.

Eventually, it became clear we really needed Lilly in it. Katie came up with the idea of Lilly delivering the girls. This let me keep the focus on everyone else, giving an excuse for our favorite pirate to exit the scene while still allowing for the delightful antics of Prim. And in the meantime, Lilly makes an excellent foil for Prim.

I had noticed early on it was difficult writing with just Prim able to speak normally, as Millie’s “umms” are a cute joke but tough to work with. Lilly came in and really saved that for me.

Mind you, I laughed when Lilly turned Millie’s “umm” into a grand emotional spectacle.

There is actually more behind Prim and tea, but that will have to wait for now.

I have no idea when the notion of the tea set animating itself came into play. It just sort of happened. Most of the bizarre things worked that way. The tongs being an enforcer came about because it seemed less entertaining to have the entire set have the same attitude. Every group needs its grump! Other pieces got a little personality added in.

Yes, I was concerned with the group dynamics of a tea set.

And with that, we bid you cheerio!

Prim and Gnomish Plunder

Okay, I have been meaning to fix up this Tale for quite some time. The formatting was not really up to snuff. And it needed a name! “Prim Tale Two” just was not cutting it.

In this Tale, we meet a character who, though she rarely makes appearances, has a major impact on Prim’s life. At some point, I will actually get around to exploring that, heh. Meanwhile, I slowly plod along with the scribing….

I would point out this was the second Tale scribed. I think it took me three nights to get it done? I should probably have set it aside for a few days, edited it. I am terrible about that. Probably the worst and hardest part for me is the time between “finishing” a Tale and then sharing it. I often get too impatient, release it without giving it a proper edit job.

By which I mean, set it aside for three days, return to it, then edit it with a fresh mindset. When I do that, I catch so much…

One would think that a clue I should do it every time. Ahem.

This Tale is also what I consider a “major” Tale, in that it is more than just a few pages. A bit more. I actually prefer writing like this, with a full, self-contained story. However, it is fun to just toss out the short one-offs that are most Tales.

In fact, sometimes it is a relief to not have to set up a scene. “Prim and Tia are tied up” is a great start — who needs details and whyfors?

Anyway, we hope you enjoy Prim Tale Two, now with a title: “Gnomish Plunder Tale”.